Saturday, June 7. 2008
The jackasses in Pyongyang who write the worshipful hagiographies of the dear leader in brutally stilted English really do crank out the comedy gold. For instance: He Cares for Everything
On the afternoon of August 17, 1975, the dear leader Kim Jong Il appeared on Ragwon Street to inspect the newly built flats.
He first looked at flat No. 4 on the second floor of block No. 4.
Standing in the bright, spacious entrance hall, he seemed very satisfied. “This has three rooms, I see,” he said.
He looked into the three rooms one after another and asked the officials whether the furnishings would be the same in the other flats as well.
In the kitchen he carefully examined a complete set of kitchen utensils, the cupboard and the refrigerator. Saying that they were very good, he ordered the furniture factory under the Administration Council to supply the citizens with a great deal of furniture.
He told the officials to supply the apartments in Ragwon Street with superfine furniture. TV set, refrigerator, washing machine and all kinds of furniture should be supplied to every flat, and they should be paid for by monthly installments. The terms of payment should be set favourably for the dwellers.
In the living room he said a low table would be more agreeable for the heated floor room than a desk and advised providing a Korean-style bookstand, low dining table and foam-cushion bed with 20-centimetre-high legs. How delighted people would then be, he remarked. Oh, undoubtedly. I can remember how ecstatically happy I was when I discovered that my bed had 20-centimetre-high legs.
The exciting conclusion after the jump!
Concluding his close inspection of the flat, he could not rest content and stepped into the next flat.
Inspecting at every corner, he asked the workers to provide a good wardrobe and shoe chest and choose prettier faucets than the ones supplied.
Hours flew by while he inspected the two flats.
The officials suggested moving on to the next item on his schedule following his inspection of the flats. However, the dear leader wanted to visit one more three-room flat and walked into the one opposite.
There he gave his opinion that the bed and the single-pedestal desk suited the three-room flat and so should be supplied to every three-room flat and that the wardrobe should be set into the wall. It would save wood, be easy to set and convenient for users.
He took a close look at the kitchen, staying there for a good while.
Then he proposed setting the cupboard about 20 cm higher, so that the tableware for everyday use could be kept on the lower shelf, while the dinner set for guests could be on the upper shelf.
The sun was setting by the time he finished looking around the flats, giving his opinion on every trifle.
The workers asked him to rest before resuming his inspection.
The dear leader remarked how pleasant it was to look at flats to be occupied by the people and said that he would like to see one more flat.
The workers obediently followed him into another flat.
There he emphasized that furniture should be supplied equally to all flats, but that a TV set should be supplied only to families that wanted it; a dining table and all other furniture should be provided without exception. Joking, he added that the people moving into these new flats should be forbidden to take their old furniture with them.
Concluding his inspection, he stopped at the ground-floor entrance to the block. For the delivery of newspapers and magazines it would be well to instal newspaper boxes, he said.
The workers thought his inspection of the flats was over, but he headed toward the adjoining block, saying he wouldn’t feel at ease unless he looked at one more block.
Following him, the workers were moved by his benevolence and deep concern for the people’s living arrangements.
It was his belief that not an atom of defect or flaw should be discovered in things to be offered to the people. The greater the workers’ admiration for him, the sharper the twinge of conscience for their unsatisfactory work.
In the next block he looked at the kitchen of a flat after inspecting the living room. Noting that the cupboard looked very nice, he personally tried its door and also examined the refrigerator closely to spot any defect.
In the bedroom he sat on the bed and, satisfied, said, “The flat is really fine. This is up to world standards.” Then he looked at the toilet, pointing out that the toilet was a barometer of people’s living standard. He mentioned that at present some workers liked to exaggerate little achievements, recalling their poor lives of the past, but this was unwelcome in current work.
Beaming with satisfaction, he remarked that the new settlers need not bring anything but quilts and tableware.
“The benevolence of the leader was really great. Everything one required in life was provided,” he said.
The workers told him over and over again that it was high time to leave, but he seemed to be asking himself if they had overlooked anything vital. Then he warned them that if the furniture of the new flats proved worse than what he had seen that day, it wouldn’t pass. A house-warming could be held after every flat was equipped with furniture as good as that he had seen that day. He would come again and see for himself whether it was up to the mark or not. He'd visit any house he wanted to. The Party Central Committee would see how loyal they were to the Party through the housing constructed in Ragwon Street, he emphasized.
His fatherly concern was not confined to Ragwon Street. Apartment blocks in Changgwang, Munsu and Kwangbok Streets, which appeared in succession, bear similar heartwarming stories about his love for the people. How can the people see a dwelling room and furniture without feeling gratitude toward him! Wow, I've just got a huuuuge lump in my throat.
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